Charlemagne, Marx, and Everything (with Apologies to Douglas Adams)
Pepin the Short's Favorite Son Charlemagne (the emperor, not the rapper), born in the 8th century CE and emperor of the Holy Roman Empire (HRE) until his death in 814 CE was the first "universal" monarch since the collapse of the [unholy] Roman Empire centuries before. In fact, all Europeans -- and their colonial descendants such as yours truly -- each and all descend from Chuck I (and also from Mohamed but let's not tell that to the flag-wavers). In other words, if you see a white person, he has the genes of Charlemagne in him. One could argue that Charlemagne, through his sexual choices and activities, has influenced every white body since, therefore every white person has been affected by Charlemagne. Or not. Because to so argue would be fallacious. Like a turtle on a turtle on a turtle on a turtle on a turtle, this becomes absurd in the extreme; the claim that A before B = A causes B has multiple problems with it. First, Our DNA Consider basic gen...